Jan 192015
 

My husband and I are going to start Seattle Sutton’s meal plan on Monday. We have signed up for the 21 meal plan so we’re going to have our breakfast, lunch and dinner pre-made for us every day of the week. I pick them up on Mondays and Thursdays..the food is fresh you keep it in your refrigerator and warm it up when you are ready to eat.

This is how we are going to start our journey, by kick starting weight loss without the stress of meal planning and counting right at the start.  Our goal though is to scale back on Seattle Sutton’s as we move forward and do part of the week on our own and part of the week with meals provided (this is an option). Then, once we think we can continue on our own with meal ideas under our belt, we will keep moving forward with healthy weight loss and then maintenance on our own.

Seattle Sutton’s doesn’t really provide counseling and emotional support, they provide a guaranteed 1200 calories a day plus a grocery list of suggestions to supplement that if your body seems to need more to be fulfilled and sustain weight loss…like increasing up to 1500 calories a day.

I will also be going to my doctor every 3 months to have all my vitals tested including fasting blood test, blood pressure, etc etc.  I will be weighing myself regularly as well as getting myself measured by my personal trainer every month per usual. This medical monitoring is a big deal…I have youth on my side, but in a few years…if I keep this weight on or add more…I am endangering my LIFE…so its buck up and solve this now or umm…die..basically…so I choose life. Death is scary…especially if its before I’m like 100 years old or something.

One thing I’m super excited about is to be able to start running again..right now running HURTS and its dangerous for my back and knees at my weight. I was doing great back when I was running at a lower weight though…so once I can fit into my running gear again, I’m going back at it….obviously easy does it…I’ll be making a plan with my personal trainer.

The other support that is needed, is emotional support….I need you my friends and family…please don’t forget about Ryan & I just because we are eating our prepped meals, we still want to see you and spend time with you! In some occasions we can adapt what is being served at a restaurant to fulfill our nutritional goals..on other occasions we’ll bring our own food or we’ll meet you after we’ve eaten.  This goes especially for myself…if eating Seattle Sutton’s 3x a day for awhile forces me to isolate myself from being social, I might lose weight…but I will also lose myself and be extremely lonely. Yes, Ryan is super awesome and I love to spend time with him, but losing weight won’t help us if we kill each other 😛

Not sure what else to say besides I’m excited and nervous to start this whole new chapter in my life….learning portion sizes, what my body needs and how to lose and then maintain for the rest of my life.

<3 Merbear

Feb 252013
 

hmm

Food planning, food prepping, eating food, shopping for food, reading menus, reading nutrition labels…thinking about food when I’m not hungry, thinking about food when I am hungry.  Worried about what I eat before I eat it. Tracking every bite that goes into my mouth. Researching nutrition of every bite that goes in my mouth in order to track it.

I’m so sick of food! I want it out of my brain!  I hate having to constantly think about it!

I did a tracking challenge for the last 8 weeks and I succeeded. It was called “Progress not Perfection” and it was put on by Dani Holmes-Kirk..she is a friend of mine, a Weight Watchers leader and a blogger on “Weight Off My Shoulders”

The challenge was to track at least 5 out of 7 days a week for 8 weeks. Well, I tracked 7/7 most of those weeks. One week I was 5/7 and another I was 6/7, but I succeeded. It was January and February. Guess what? I didn’t lose weight. Nope, I never lied on my tracker…but I was constantly over points.

In the last two weeks I’ve made a push to get more activity in daily, its the focus of the month for Weight Watchers and I saw I need a minimum of 12 points of activity a week, which I wasn’t getting. So I walk more/run more I made a plan to do that in order to pump it up.  But guess what? I’m eating all those points…and still going over. BUT, at least its WAY less over than it was before.

I reset my “start” weight at WW last week hoping it would help motivate me only see the scale go down, but I fear I’ve failed again and the scale is going to go up on Wednesday. I’m exercising my butt off today and Tuesday in hopes to at least come out at a maintain…ugh, I hate food!

I’m hungry right now and I’m afraid to eat something because I’m afraid that its going to be the wrong thing to satiate my hunger and then I just wasted points on something that didn’t work on making me feel full. I will eat don’t worry, obviously I eat. But ugh, every day this is a challenge.

Then, if I go enough days without filling myself with what I”m craving, I finally bust out and eat a cheeseburger on the weekend or something. Which technically its fine, but I tried so hard to fill a craving all week that I really don’t have enough points for it.

Thanks for listening to me complain, I would LOVE if you guys have any ideas for staying within my points (if its calorie limits or food choice goals for you guys, that’s cool, too)!!

<3 Merbear

Dec 172012
 

I just need to get it out!

Last week, after a month at weight watchers, not only did I not lose, I gained back everything plus some that I lost in the last month! Whaaaat?  I’m so mad!

And now…its Monday….I have tomorrow and another weigh in coming up on Wednesday, and I do not want to go. I’m 50 points over..no, not 50 points over daily points…50 points over even if you count in my weeklies and my activity points! (not like I got many of those, that’s a whole different story).

I was going to turn it all around today….I ate a healthy breakfast, I packed a good lunch, I was all ready to go…and then…I got a fever on my way to work, hacking cough….could barely think….I basically got sent home…fine..ok…sick

I took some work home with me to occupy my time….but my feelings got in the way, I felt sick, mopey, blah…and I kept picking at the kitchen. Doesn’t it suck when you are too sick to go to work, but not sick enough to be stuck in bed sleeping…so you just, “mope”? I know you guys know where I’m coming from.

Oh but also too sick to walk on the treadmill, or go outside in the crummy/snowy/freezing rainy weather, or exercise…yeah my throat is bad…so all I can do is sit here, pouting, watching TV, and fighting every single second to not go into the kitchen.

Then I get home and hubby hides in the basement, totally not his fault, he doesn’t want to get sick, and I agree…but, I also don’t have a diversion from being BORED and feeling bad for myself.

So I’m hoping this complaining, whiny, feeling guilty about eating anything in my face post…helps me just sit here and be a grown up and quit eating…

Sigh….I just want to at least stay the same weight on Friday..please WW, be nice to me…

I think I will go to my WW meeting, even though I’m freaked as to what it’ll say 🙁

<3 Merbear

 

P.S. I need to look at this more maybe….

August 2011

August 2012

 

 

March 2012

 

Nov 2012

Nov 2012

Nov 132012
 

As most of you know I’ve lost 40 lbs on Slimgenics, and I’m extremely thankful for the program, the counselors, the friends I’ve made via the program online and here at home…..but, I’m done.

No, I’m not done losing weight, but I’m done with Slimgenics…the time for a super strict…can’t have bananas, melons, avocados & carrots plan is over.  I’ve learned some excellent fundamentals from Slimgenics about eating a high protein, lower carb, low glycemic index diet in order to lose weight quickly…..but this is not something I’m going to survive on. I need to learn to lose and then maintain using the much more open, easy to work into intense workouts, group support atmosphere of Weight Watchers. I’m toying the idea of getting to goal and then applying to be a leader….that’s how much I like Weight Watchers.

You may ask: “Well, why haven’t you gotten to go before on Weight Watchers, Meredith?”  My answer is that I truly wasn’t in the right place to have balance yet…I was only in a place for quick solutions. Now, my life is balanced..I exercise…and its FUN….the majority of my friends and all of my family  have a healthy lifestyle…and, well I’m ready. I’m ready to have more choices…..I don’t need the restrictions anymore.

I’m excited that Liz @LutherLiz has a meeting that I can attend with her….she is super motivational and inspiring to me..and that extra push of having a friend in the meetings is just what I need!

So, on to Weight Watchers…tomorrow morning!

<3 Merbear

Oct 122012
 

Tonight I tweeted out that I felt another whiny blog post coming on and my awesome friends reached out to me.

So instead I want to talk about how important feeling and getting out your feelings can be.

If I hadn’t have shared how I was feeling, Dawn wouldn’t have asked me what was up. Reaching out and telling her & the Twitterverse that I felt like a failure for gaining the weight back that I lost last week and that I was fearing more failure this weekend, empowered me to be open to solving the problem.

Dawn, Liz and other friends tweeted and messaged me that tomorrow is a new day, to focus on what I’d important, get a new start, make new decisions. They are so right. I needed to hear that my guilt about gaining and wanting to sabotage another day are in my head and not that messed up or unsolvable.

Saturday, here in the twin cities, is the Zombie Pub Crawl. I was worried that crawling from bar to bar with my friends would just be way too tempting, after the disappointing week weight wise I’ve had, to not just give in and eat and drink whatever I choose. But, its not true, my supportive friends helped me see that there’s the fun of dressing like a zombie, spending the evening being silly with my friends, hearing bands, dancing, rides and karaoke to look forward to.

I’m in control, I know this now. I’m not saying I won’t have a beer or two, or some special zombie treat. I just don’t have a reason to be worried about it anymore. The night is mine!

Thank you friends, you know who you are, vocal or not this particular evening you are all in my head, cheering for my success.

Oh and P.S. For the first time ever I bought a regular sized, kinda naughty, Halloween costume! Yess!

Merbear

Refocus…eye on the prize

 control, Food, goals, guilty, lifestyle, popchips, progress, Setbacks, slimgenics, weight  Comments Off on Refocus…eye on the prize
Sep 282012
 

First…popchips, win them til Oct 5.

So, I may have not done the “stopped posting cause I’m not seeing results” thing that does happen to many bloggers….but I did do that “leeeeet’s keep it to myself that I gained weight back” thing. I didn’t go onto MyFitnessPal, like I had been, religiously, after every weigh in at Slimgenics..and update my gains. I was kinda embarrassed…everyone was so proud of me for losing 50 lbs…and at first I kinda just yo-yo’d…you know…down 50 lbs, down 48 lbs, down 49 lbs, down 47 lbs…then…it kinda went more like down 45 lbs, down 43 lbs…and yup…I’m down 38 lbs..even though I was 2 lbs away from 50 before my birthday.

Guys…summer is hard. Its not an excuse…its just a share…cuz I know the rest of you sometimes feel this way, too.

I actually don’t feel like winter holidays are as challenging as fun, spontaneous, bbq, boat ride, camping, fair, and concert filled summers. There are SO MANY freaking guides and tools for winter…the best foods to eat for holidays…how to avoid halloween candy, what’s the best way to fill your plate on thanksgiving. Plus, seriously, those holidays, at least to me are A DAY. I can hunker down and get tough on myself for A DAY..and do the positive self talk and food prep and planning.

BUT A WHOLE SUMMER…oh goodness, its been hard. Thank the bejeezus I only gained 10 lbs. Fortunately I didn’t have to go back to fat pants or something like that..but I noticed a little more annoying “flub” hanging over the waist line…my little tshirts that were finally super cute were looking a bit too floppy..you know the drill.

It also didn’t help that Ryan (my fiance), had hit maintenance…and while its still hard…he got to switch to just watching his balance of food groups and counting calories..he had no more “no-no” foods that Slimgenics blocks while you are in weight loss mode. I wasn’t eating out of spite that I was still on plan or something…I just was a little to “lax” with the rules…and it bit me in the butt! Until I reach a good lean body mass…my body isn’t as good at maintaining fat loss..and we all know fat attracts fat!

So NOW…I am going to buckle down….I’m going to get to goal by Thanksgiving…EYES ON THE PRIZE…I have to fight through Oktoberfest this weekend, Renaissance Festival, too. Some birthdays, some family events…even BEER SCHOOL…but I will DO THIS. Who’s with me?

I’m totally on board for #DontEatTheTreat on Twitter with @Tidbits_of_Tara and @redstar5 coming up next month through the holidays, too! Follow them on Twitter and/or their blogs to get in on the mindset!

What do you guys think? Is summer harder? Is winter harder?

<3 Merbear

Sep 162012
 

 

Do you ever have one of those days where you don’t want to start eating? Not because you’re afraid of food, or you’re wanting to starve yourself, but you just don’t want to do the work of planning the meal, making the meal, and recording the meal. It just,  once in awhile…feels like too much?

This happens to me…and its not because I want to be *bad*…its not because I want to eat foods that are off my healthy eating plan or something….I just, ugh, I’m feeling lazy…that’s all, plain and simple.

You folks know I’m finishing up Slimgenics now, but I’ve done Weight Watchers, My Fitness Pal, Sparkpeople, Ediets…all those things…and none of the eating plans really have a….”do whatever” type of plan.  Its obvious why, if I’m not conscious of what I’m eating…then the eating *can* go bad, so why would any plan want that to happen.

I always end up eating on these days, because like I said I’m not for starving myself or anything.  But, I usually do it when I am quite hungry and I’m annoyed at being hungry because it doesn’t feel good. Then I begrudgingly write down what I ate, which is usually an apple, or peach or something that is easy for me….and I move on..throughout the day, being annoyed at recording my food.  Again, not because I’d rather be eating bad for me food, just kinda, meh, about forever having to think about what I eat.

Usually by the next day I’m over the feeling and it goes away for at least a week if not more. Most of the time if it happens its on a weekend…when I want to turn my brain off.

Will I ever be able to turn my brain off about this stuff? I mean I remember to breathe, to blink, to look both ways before crossing the street..how much longer til I can just eat right? Ever?

I don’t really have a solution besides the fact that to survive, I eat…so don’t worry about me not doing that..

Thoughts?

<3 Merbear

Aug 212012
 

A few things have happened in the last couple of months!

I visited Cleveland with my fiance and ran an impromptu 5K with his cousins, I’m proud that I can just “run a 5K’ and be able to finish it without much planning.  If I train ahead then I can maybe PR or something, but if someone just asks me about running 5K or a 3 mile run around the lake…I can just do it…which is so nice.

I’ve been training for the Minneapolis Duathlon which is coming up this Sunday, the 26th.  Then I’m following that up with the Women’ Rock 10K the following Saturday..I’m very excited to be rounding out my summer with these challenging races!

I’ve been back to getting used to riding long distances on my bike and its like old hat. My body remembers and loves doing it.  So, I’m very much looking forward to the 15 mile biking portion of the Duathlon this week! It is a little challenging to move from the bike to the 2nd run…your legs are just kinda stuck in the biking mode…and you already just ran 3 miles before the bike ride, too.

I’ve been practicing my transitions and while my 2nd runs have been slow, they are doable and I know I will finish the Du and be extremely proud!

Another kinda bummer item that happened last week is I lost my full time job.  I think that this is a good change for me, its scary not having a job, but I’m ready to move into a career in social media, web content production, copywriting, white papers, and/or community management. I’ve been seeing a bunch of opportunities pop up, but if any of you blog followers out there want to send a recommendation or referral my way, that would be fantastic!

I need to be able to work to support my healthy habits!! 🙂  Yes, running technically is free….but as serious runners know…I need to make sure I have good shoes, healthy fuel, and the right running clothes and necessary accessories.  I also want to be able to keep going to my personal trainer, she keeps me well rounded and my muscles willing and able to run and bike!

With the summer there have been many eating challenges for me. I feel like there are so many lovely, fresh, tempting foods out there in the summer that just more easily tempt me. There are also many more social gatherings! Lots more strategizing, planning, and preparing for challenging eating situations all summer. Sometimes is really hard to stay focused and afloat.

This summer I have maintained my Slimgenics loss, lots of ups and downs, but maintaining.  I have another 20ish pounds to lose though, I want and need to be done with the weight loss portion. I thought I was focused again and then losing my job didn’t help. I’m not eating to fill emotions, I know this….but I’m just at home and lazy. I need to do like what I did for work….quick, filling breakfast…snack…lunch…snack…dinner. Almost like I should pack myself a lunch in the morning even though I’m not going anywhere. Hmm, this sounds like a good idea that I thought of while I was typing to you guys…I might just do that! At least “plan” my lunch, I don’t have to put it in a bag…haha!

That’s about it for now, I’m very happy to be back to blogging and connecting with all of you!

<3 Merbear

Nov 302011
 

This morning my friend @amyalbrecht posted on Twitter to the #f2fpack:

“I’m making today good food choice Wednesday! The goal is to stay under my calories, work out with the Wii tonight AND blog about it”

Well this week I’ve really needed a kick in the butt. Right as she was posting that I was posting on Twitter @merbearmn:

“I’ve been tracking but since Friday I’ve been ~ 200 cals over my daily goal!….”

So then I thought, you know what, I’m going to join Amy in the challenge and I invited Sarah @fabchallenge who’s been looking for some motivation to join us, too!

Well, I’m SO glad I made the decision…as soon as I walked into the break room at work this morning someone and brought in ALL THEIR LEFTOVER PUMPKIN PIE! For the love of…@#$%* but I had my challenge, and some days I might have tried to “budget” it in and given up a few healthier things in my lunch and snacks to eat it, but not today! No way! Today was Good Food Choice Wednesday!

I ate a yummy spinach salad with sunflower seeds, blue cheese, leftover turkey and tomatoes on it.  I also had a snack of my favorite Chobani 0% Pomegranate with blueberries mixed in!  I realized, if I just eat this stuff, its good, its filling, its tasty, it makes me feel good and it throws a better party in my mouth than Doritos or cookies ever will! Seriously!  Cause the party keeps going..instead of getting instant gratification of a cookie and then feeling guilty after…you get the gratification of something tasty AND you feel good which helps us make MORE good decisions!

Head on over to Destroying Dead Ends to see how Amy did! Then head over to Sarah’s blog Finding My Fabulosity and see how she fared!

I have one more day of work this week…which will start out with weight lifting, then elliptical and after work running around the Metrodome! I’m pumped for some temperature controlled running that isn’t the treadmill!  I’ll report on how it was!

After Thursday I have Friday through next Wednesday off!  I’ll be in Chicago for the weekend, I’m going to run the Santa Hustle 5K! Its going to be featured on the Travel Channel! We’ll be wearing santa beards and technical Ts that look like Santa Suits! YAY! I’ll take pics and post about that for sure, too! 🙂

<3 Merbear

Nov 222011
 

….I start thinking about maybe doing my weekly weigh in on Thursday morning or maybe Sunday instead of Friday morning.

If I think I’m ready for Thanksgiving, if I have a plan in place….I know what I want to eat, what my strategies are for new foods, how I will organize my plate and focus on socializing with family….then why do I not want to weigh myself on Friday morning?

Why should weighing myself on Friday morning be an issue? I’ve been good all week. I’ve counted my calories, done my workouts, drank my water..I’m even pumped up on MyFitnessPal posts in the time line with my friends that follow each other.

Do I want to give myself an out? Just in case I want…hmm…what would I want that would send me off the hook into a eating too much frenzy?  Turkey? no. Stuffing? not really. Peas? Heh, haha, umm no. Gravy? I only ever take a little, not really a huge gravy person. Mashed potatoes? Well…maybe..I really love them…but they are just potatoes……hmmm PIE! Maybe I’m afraid of not controlling myself around pie?  There won’t be much…my family doesn’t go overboard. A slice or two? That won’t make my weight go up. Especially after making smart choices all week and through out the day.

I guess I don’t want to even put it out there that my week could be messed up, admit that I might make a mistake, that I might eat too much for Thanksgiving….I won’t have to even risk it if I don’t weigh myself  the day after Thanksgiving, or plan not to weigh myself…then it won’t matter what happens I can tell myself I’ve been good without even trying.

Durrr….

I know what I should do….

Not sure what I will do…hrmmm..

This post was supposed to convince me to do the right thing…which I probably will do I just can’t promise it to myself just yet.

<3 Merbear